How to Control What is Controllable
Summary: Young athletes often experience anxiety when they try to control factors beyond their influence, such as opponents, weather, or coaching decisions. By focusing instead on controllable elements—like effort, attitude, preparation, nutrition, and rest—they gain a sense of empowerment and reduce stress. This “control what is controllable” mindset strengthens resilience, boosts confidence, and helps athletes stay focused on their own growth.
Do your sports kids worry too much before and during competitions?
When they worry, they’re often trying to control issues related to performance that are outside of their direct control.
These issues include getting injured, being benched by a coach, playing against a higher ranked opponent and competing in poor weather conditions.
For example, when kids focus on how well an opponent is playing (which is outside of their control), it can spark anxiety and take the focus off of what kids should be concentrating on–themselves and their game.
Kids need to learn this important lesson:
They should focus on controlling what’s controllable.
This may seem like a minor issue. But it’s important; controlling the controllables gives kids a sense that they have an impact on their destiny and that their performance is not dictated by outside forces.
Remind young athletes that they can’t control how many minutes their coach plays them in a game. But they can control their effort and focus during practice. They can control their attitude.
Even when kids are suffering from an injury, they’re still in control of their attitude, their ability to relax and their overall perspective.
Here’s an example: The status of the 2021 Tokyo Olympics is uncertain due to the pandemic. But athletes can embrace a “control what is controllable” mindset.
Nicole Forrester, a 2008 Olympic Canadian high jumper and mental performance coach, has helped prepare Canadian athletes for the 2021 Tokyo Olympic Games. In this effort, she emphasizes the importance of controlling the controllables and letting everything else go.
“What can’t you control? You can’t control the virus, you can’t control access to a facility, and you can’t control whether the Olympics is a certainty or not, but you treat it as if it is. But you can control your nutrition; you can control your sleep,” she said.
It’s Empowering for Sports Kids to Focus on What they can Control.
Focusing on the controllables gives meaning to all the hours kids spent training, the sacrifices they made as athletes and the dedication of pushing themselves to achieve their goals.
One tip to control what is controllable: Kids should recognize when they’re blinded by their circumstances and then take action to shift their perspective. To do this, they can write down as many variables of performance that are under their control. It doesn’t matter how small or insignificant they may seem.
For example, sports kids can control their thinking, how they react to challenges, their preparation and their nutrition.
They can’t control the weather conditions, the field conditions, officials, judges or their opponents.
Help kids stop focusing on things they can’t control. Help them recognize when this is happening, and refocus their thoughts. This will allow them to feel empowered. It will also boost their confidence and success in sports.
How to Teach Focus?
1. Teach Young Athletes to Control the Controllables
Sports kids should focus on what they can control in sports—such as their effort, mindset, and preparation—rather than worrying about external factors like referees, weather, or opponents. This shift reduces sports anxiety and builds confidence.
2. Encourage a Positive Attitude in Youth Sports
Even when facing setbacks like injuries or limited playtime, young athletes can control their attitude in competition. A positive perspective keeps them motivated and resilient, helping them bounce back stronger.
3. Use Mindset Strategies to Reduce Sports Anxiety
When kids worry too much before games, guide them to refocus on their performance mindset. Writing down what they can control (nutrition, sleep, preparation) helps them let go of stress and stay mentally tough in youth sports.
4. Build Mental Resilience Through Daily Habits
Athletes can’t control external circumstances, but they can control sports performance habits like sleep, nutrition, training effort, and recovery. Consistently practicing these controllables strengthens mental resilience and long-term athletic success.
5. Help Kids Stop Comparing Themselves to Opponents
Instead of focusing on how talented or skilled their rivals are, remind kids to concentrate on self-improvement in sports. This mindset reduces pressure, builds confidence, and improves game-day focus.
Related Sports Psychology Articles
- Improve Sports Kids’ Confidence and Focus
- Tips for Young Athletes Focus
- Staying Focused When it Matters Most: Tips From a Top Skater
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FAQ: Helping Young Athletes Control the Controllables
Q: Why do young athletes feel anxious before competitions?
A: Young athletes often worry about factors they can’t control, such as opponents’ skills, playing time, injuries, or weather conditions. This takes their focus away from their own performance.
Q: What does it mean to “control what is controllable”?
A: It means focusing only on what can be directly managed—like effort, preparation, nutrition, sleep, mindset, and attitude—while letting go of external factors that can’t be changed.
Q: How does focusing on controllables improve performance?
A: When athletes concentrate on their own actions, they feel more empowered, confident, and resilient. This reduces anxiety, keeps them focused, and boosts overall performance.
Q: Can athletes still apply this mindset if they’re injured or benched?
A: Yes. Even in those situations, they can control their attitude, recovery routines, relaxation, and perspective. This helps maintain motivation and confidence.
Q: How can parents and coaches support this approach?
A: Parents and coaches can remind kids to identify what’s within their control, redirect their focus when they fixate on outside factors, and encourage positive daily habits like good nutrition, rest, and preparation.
How to Control What is Controllable
Kids Sports Psychology expert Patrick Cohn, Ph.D. has helped athletes for over 35 years to enhance their performance. Dr. Cohn earned a master’s degree in sports psychology from CSUF and a Ph.D. from the University of Virginia, specializing in Applied Sports Psychology. Today, he is the president and founder of Peak Performance Sports, LLC in Orlando, Florida.